Exam results day: Top tips for parents and carers

For many young people, the day they receive their results can be full of excitement and celebration, and for others it can be a time of worry and potential disappointment.

It is normal for young people to feel a real mix of emotions around results day, asking questions like 'did I do enough?', 'will I get the grades I need?', 'what if I fail?'. Here are some ideas to help calm their nerves on the big day and how parents can support them.

10 tips for results day

1. Have something planned the day before to take their mind away from worrying. They could meet up with friends, go for a relaxing walk, arrange a day out or have a movie marathon.
   
   
2. Encourage them to try and get a good night's sleep.
   
   
3. Set a time to collect their results and plan other activities throughout the day to keep busy until it's time to go.
   
   
4. Think about who is going to collect the results with them, whether they'd like to go with friends or family for support on the day.
   
   
5. Have time to reflect without comparison to others - everyone has a different journey and a different path.
   
   
6. Make time to talk in the lead up to results day about how they might feel/cope on the day - they may find it hard to let you know how they feel or ask for help.
   
   
7. Try not to place on pressure on your teens. Saying that you think they will do well may feel like it's reassuring, but you don't want them to think you are disappointed if they don't get the results you expected. Instead, remind them of the effort they put in and let them know that you love them and that you are proud of them and for everything they have done.
   
   
8. Support them to think about next steps, maybe going through pros and cons for their different options.
   
   
9. Using language like "I am sorry, it's really hard when things don't go to plan", and "I am here to help you, we will find a way forward" are helpful. It is important they know that failing exams does not make them a failure.
   
   
10. Don't dismiss their worries - exam pressure is real! Over 87,000 children visit the ChildLine website every year seeking advice. In recent years, there has been a 200% increase in young people seeking counselling for exam stress.

Dealing with disappointment

It can feel very overwhelming, disheartening, and disappointing not to get the results you expected. It is important that young people can speak to someone who can support them and guide them in their next steps.

If things have not gone as expected, let young people know that they still have plenty of opportunities and time to reach their future goals. It is important to validate their feelings of disappointment and overwhelm and let them know you are there to support them without judgement.

Support your teens to put things into perspective and help them find answers to questions they may have around their next steps. They may want to start thinking about other courses, colleges and universities they could apply to, or they could check with their chosen sixth form, college or university to see if they will accept them with the results they have.

They may also be able to explore options they hadn't previously considered, like a work-based apprenticeship, a gap year or foundation year. Try to keep an open mind - all is not lost.

Finally, be there for your teens and remind them not to be hard on themselves. Let them know you are proud of them for who they are. Celebrate their success if they received what they wanted, and if they didn't, reassurance and acceptance will be needed more than ever.

Useful websites

• UCAS website - here you can chat to students who have been in your shoes.
• ChildLine offer tips for teens on coping with the worry of results day.
• Young Minds have useful advice for parents on exam results stress.
• National Bureau for students with disabilities promotes opportunities for young people and adults with any kind of disability in post-16 education, training, and employment across the UK.

Over to you

If you'd like to help your pupils to manage the pressures of assessments and build the resilience they need to take on future challenges, click here to book a Discovery Call with your regional expert. Designed to fit in around your schedule, these free 30-minute conversations via Teams give you a chance to have your questions answered, decide if our service is a fit for your needs, and identify if you qualify for a £1,200 DfE grant to spend in your setting.